If You're Single, Look Forward to Being the Best Version of Yourself

If You're Single, Look Forward to Being the Best Version of Yourself


More mental clarity. 

Sweet loving feels so dang good, and when something hits right, who really wants to lose that? That fear of abandonment—of withdrawal, of anxious attachment—breeds obsession. When you obsess (ruminate,) you'll find personal projects fall to the wayside and mental space at capacity: then energy quickly depletes. 


And when a relationship like that fails, it takes even more time to pick up the pieces of your identity you've put down. 


Without obsession (and way too much of your attention focused on another person), you can tend to yourself and create space for abundance. 



Better sleep.

Sure sleeping next to someone you like releases oxytocin and is overall lovely, but sleeping without disturbance and not sharing space— means better rest, more energy, and boosted productivity. 


If you have big dreams, you need the beauty of sleep (and not exactly a lover's arms.)


Deeper relationships. 

Relationships are complex; the ones you have with yourself, your partner, friends, and family require energy and time. So we naturally spend more time with those we are physically intimate with (your love interest), and when we do, studies show we spend less time tending to our platonic relationships. In fact, one study says every time we get a new love interest, we lose touch with two of our closest friends. 


If you're single, look forward to additional time to strengthen those bonds.



You don't settle for the first person who shows interest.

When you're single, you have a clearer head, one that doesn't eagerly push you toward the first person who shows some interest. But, of course, just because someone displays the desire to get to know you does not mean they're a match. But when we're uncomfortable not being partnered, dating may seem like a lifeline...when in reality, it's setting you back. You'll more than likely be welcoming, with open arms, a bunch of someone else's trauma. 



You find yourself and develop boundaries.

Not to say you can't do some self-discovery within a relationship, but it's normal to compromise and make adjustments when you get together with someone, but this isn't always done in the best way. 


Compromising is entirely different from giving up your hopes and dreams to satisfy your person. In a healthy relationship, each person has a strong sense of self and good communication skills. 


And yes, within a healthy relationship, you'll continue growing as an individual. As you and your partner explore yourselves and each other, the relationship will grow. But to begin a healthy relationship, you first need to establish your boundaries, desires, and fears. 



You'll be less materialistic????

Apparently, there's a correlation between being single, valuing freedom, and seeking more meaningful work and experiences. In a study that spanned roughly 12 years, those who were not with someone valued creativity, freedom, and exploration. Single people apparently got more happiness out of the aforementioned values than a married person who may appreciate those same things. 



You're going to be healthier (and maybe thinner).

A paper on relationships and health claims that single people who live alone are more than likely healthier. While this is a nice side-effect... the more in-depth reason single people are thinner is they're on the dating market; they perceive themselves as competing. 


But for a healthier relationship with yourself, shift the focus from competition to presenting a self you're proud of. Say to yourself: I want to be the best version of myself because I value myself, not because of the Becky's and Stacy's of this world. 


You can focus when you're single; this is perhaps the one solid theme present in all the reasons to stay single.